


Things I Never Planned

by Venturous



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M, Severus Birthday Challenge, Severus Shorts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-09
Updated: 2012-07-09
Packaged: 2017-11-09 12:23:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/455419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Venturous/pseuds/Venturous
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On the morning of his 50th birthday, Severus remembers things he never expected to happen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Things I Never Planned

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Severus Snape's 50th birthday, January 9, 2010.  
> Many thanks to my beta readers ivylady and carpet_diemon, who made this into a better story.

_Old age is the most unexpected of all the things that happen to a man. -- Leon Trotsky_

 

JANUARY 9, 2010  
MELVAIG, THE HIGHLANDS

 

Despite the chill air, Severus nestled comfortably in his willow twig chair, bundled in his warming spell-infused cloak, steaming mug at hand.  
_  
I never thought I would wake to this day. But then, I never thought I would live to see forty years, much less a half-century. Of course, my life has been rife with the unexpected._

 _  
_ The cottage windows were dark, but dawn light streamed around the house, skimming foam off the waves roiling beneath ominous clouds. __  
  
Look at that storm blowing in--a real blizzard, likely. I can feel the wind pushing ahead of the squall. It makes me want to set sail.  


He sipped from his mug. __  
  
Preposterous. We sold the boat.

The slate grey sea was seething in the dawn light. Whitecaps raced across the Minch and pummeled the rocks below, reaching closer with the rising tide. A rush of salt wind lifted Severus' silvered hair and rustled the grasses below. __  
  
No one is awake at this early hour, for which I am profoundly grateful. Do not misread me; I adore my family, but I treasure this quiet time. I would surely die for them.  


_As if I haven't once already._

 

_  
_

_  
_

_*_ *******  
MAY 1998  
FAULENSEE, SWITZERLAND

 

 

Severus awoke in a high-ceilinged room painted dove grey with furnishings the colour of bleached bone. When he tried to turn his head to see to window, he found himself unable to move. Soon the clacking of boot heals heralded the arrival of help. He opened his mouth to expound on his intolerable situation only to find that he had no voice. And his throat hurt. Stunned and exhausted, he melted back into his pillow.

  
"Ah, Sie sind wach, Herr Smith. Das ist sehr gut."The Mediwitch scanned him with her wand, her hazel eyes studying him with care. He scowled at her, but failed to achieve anything like the menacing look he had hoped for. He closed his eyes and sighed. Even this was painful.

  
Soon Lucius was by his bedside. "My old friend, how good to see you wake." Malfoy spoke softly, smoothing the bedcovers. "You are at Faulensee, an old healing center in Switzerland. Only the best magical treatments...." he trailed off when he caught the demanding look in Severus' eyes.

  
Lucius explained how he'd known of the Dark Lord's plan and made one of his own, and thus was present in the Shack when Snape was 'murdered'. After insuring that Potter and the mudblood were truly gone, Lucius had rushed to Severus' side and cast a hurried spell to close his wound, then forced a potion down his throat and Apparated them away.

  
He described how weeks had passed while Snape had been in a coma, and how the entire Wizarding world believed him dead.

  
_Just as well,_ Severus thought bitterly, because he had no idea where to go from there.

 

 

********  
JANUARY 9, 2010  
MELVAIG, THE HIGHLANDS

 

 

_So now, what of the future I never planned to see? I know the kids will ask me later to make a wish over their silly cake. So much unexpected pleasure has come to me already, is there anything else to want?_

  
He had a few gripes with the world at large. Foolish Muggles continued to slay each other over abstruse religious distinctions, and convert the planet into refuse at an alarming rate. Wizarding society seemed but marginally wiser. Yet, since the War, much work has gone into appreciating the qualities of all wizardkind as well as its magical brethren. If only Remus had lived to see a Werewolf Council at the Wizengamot!

_If only Remus--hell--the 'if only' list is far too long: Regulus. Lily. Albus. Lucius._

Though the ache that bloomed in his chest was familiar, it no longer paralyzed him, not the way it once had.

 

 

********  
MAY 1998  
FAULENSEE, SWITZERLAND

 

Severus remembered those long months at Faulensee as an eternity of dismal waiting. He had expected to be dead, for all the business of living to be concluded, and he was alternately bewildered and despondent to find himself alive. When Malfoy told him of Remus' death in battle, Severus broke down and wept. He knew he should feel some shame for such blatant emotion, but in his weakened state there was no stopping the rush of grief. The tally of the ruined and the dead had long since passed tolerable. Yet the death of this man, a man he had known most of his life, through school and work and war, somehow ripped open a fresh wound. This man had been his enemy and oh-so-briefly his lover, his colleague and finally his brother-in-arms.  
If not for Lucius, in those first few weeks he would not have known how to survive. But at times, he wished his friend had left him to die as had been his plan.

 

 

********  
JANUARY 9, 2010  
MELVAIG, THE HIGHLANDS

 

 

A floorboard creaked. Severus, intent on the sea, pretended not to be aware of the figure approaching behind him. He sighed and took a drink from his mug. Light was streaming through breaks in the clouds, now racing overhead.

  
"Good morning." His voice was soft yet gravelly from disuse.

  
Hands snaked through his hair, followed along his jaw, down his neck and lightly across his collarbones, then fanned out across his shoulders.. He leant into the touch, eyes closing, lips curling ever so slightly. A kiss landed upon his crown.

  
"Good morning, love. Won't you come back to bed ?" Harry murmured into his hair.

  
Severus pretended to weigh this against some nonexistent alternative before he rose and followed his husband into the cottage.

 

 

********  
JANUARY 9, 2001  
KOLN, GERMANY

 

Severus whispered a soft Alohomora under his steaming breath as he jiggled the frozen door latch, clutching his parcels under one arm. The door clicked free, and he kicked it open with a snowy boot. Fastening the latch and warding the door, he knocked the snow from his feet as he stomped down the worn stone stairs to his half-basement flat. He dumped the parcels on the table and conjured a spark to a few candles. In the flickering light, one might have mistaken 'shabby' for charming. Books lined the walls and most available surfaces, and they were stacked in columns on the floor. Snape hung up his cloak and pulled a heavy drape across the drafty stairs. He put the kettle on and set a fire in the grate.

  
When he first arrived in Koln, he found work in an apothecary that provided magical herbs to the perfume industry. With a mild glamour, a haircut and a trim beard Severus was confident he would evade recognition. He put away his groceries and sorted through the post.

  
"Chosen One Engaged to Marry!" screamed the lurid headline when he unfolded the Prophet. Severus studied the photo. The Youngest Weasley clung to the Boy Hero, looking smug. Potter's glasses had caught the light, making it difficult to read his expression, even as he turned to smile and wave at well-wishers.

  
The tea kettle whistled.

 

 

********  
OCTOBER 31, 2001  
GODRIC'S HOLLOW

 

_Note to self: never, ever Apparate when drunk._

  
Severus bent over a small gravestone and retched. He hoped its unfortunate occupant expected no visitors that evening. He didn't dare risk banishing the mess, since his aim was a bit off.  
He straightened up and attempted to smooth his robes and walk purposefully across the churchyard. Racing clouds obscured the moon until a beam broke free and illuminated James and Lily Potter's grave.

  
_What in Merlin's name am I doing here?_ He listed a bit left, and wobbled as he over-corrected his step.

CRACK.

A wizard materialized in front of him and fell to his knees at the grave.

_Potter. Oh, this is wonderful._

Severus puzzled, earnestly wishing he had not impaired his cognition. He had to think fast. Fortunately the Boy Who Lived had his back to him, and was softly sobbing as he spoke to the granite monument. "If only you could have been there, Mum, Dad. Oh, I wish you could have been there with me." He sniffled. Severus still hadn't come up with a solution. He stood there, crumpled carnations in his fist, feeling a right idiot, watching Potter make a fool of himself, blubbering. He sighed.

  
Harry startled and turned, and before Snape could react to what was about to happen, Potter shrieked, then shouted at him. "Hey, you, who the hell ... you could scare a bloke half to death like that you know. This is a graveyard after all, and ...." Potter stared. Severus stared back, speechless.

  
_I swear, I will never touch another drop of firewhisky._

Harry laughed as he stood up, shaking his head. "Hahaha! I thought I saw a ghost for a minute there, ha-ha! Well, you know, All Hallows Eve and this being a graveyard, and ha-ha..." He paused, a slight frown crinkling his youthful brow, before drew himself up and scowled a bit. "Hey, who are you, anyway, and what are you doing here?"

  
Severus stared. He looked at the ground and softly said, "I knew your mother."

Now it was Harry's turn to stare. In fact he gaped, then went white as a sheet. "No. You, you are… dead." He stepped forward as if to grab Severus' sleeve. Snape decided that he was quite sober enough, considering the circumstances, to Apparate, and he vanished with a crack.

 

 

********  
JANUARY 9, 2002  
KOLN, GERMANY

 

Severus unwarded the door at 3 am because some imbecile was beating on it loudly enough to wake the dead. Harry Potter stumbled on the top step and fell into his arms.  
Oh, that imbecile.

"You git, it took me forever to find you." Potter showed no signs of releasing his nightshirt. Snape considered the potential for a memorable public fuss on his doorstep, then took him by the shoulders and set him on his feet, firmly. "Please do come in, Mr. Potter." He held open the velvet drape.

Harry did come in, and quite purposefully seized Severus and kissed him wetly on the mouth. Thoroughly.

Having passed through irritation to shock and then astonishment, Severus decided to try amusement. He accepted, and eventually returned the kiss. He found his small response yielded a very enthusiastic reply from Potter, who rutted against him as he explored Snape's teeth and sucked at his lip. This made Severus almost giggle, it was so ridiculous. He resisted however, as he could not recall the last time he had a warm and willing young man climbing him with lascivious intent.

When he was able to detach Potter's mouth from his own, he spoke briefly: "Boots off. Bedchamber. Now, Potter!" Harry beamed and eagerly complied.

 

****

In the dawn, Severus rose and dressed, then yanked the sheet off of the naked sleeping form. "Get up, and out, Potter! I have to get to work." Harry groaned, groped for covers and rolled over.

Severus sighed. _This isn't going to be simple, is it?_

 

********

JANUARY 9, 2005  
KOLN, GERMANY

 

"Dammit, Potter, I will not be party to this travesty. This is no 'relationship', you imbecile. I refuse to be your schoolboy fantasy and pity fuck. You pop in here whenever you're hard, or feeling sorry for yourself. I am through being your free counselor and whore. Get out of my house."

"Severus, please, you don't understand..." Harry looked sheepish and damnably alluring, his green eyes filling with tears, enlarged by those idiotic glasses. Why can't he wear contacts?  
Severus growled and shoved him out the door despite the disadvantage of pushing uphill. "Oh, I understand perfectly well, Mr. Potter. You go home to your pregnant wife and live your happy life.

Do not ever darken my door again, is that clear?"  
Severus slammed the door with a grunt, and slumped to the floor while Harry pounded furiously on the door. He cast a silencing charm to keep him from waking the neighbors and warded the door.

Then he went downstairs and began to pack.

 

 

********  
JANUARY 9, 2007  
LACOSTE, FRANCE

 

He had no idea how Potter had managed to locate him now that he had moved all the way to the south of France, but he knew when he heard that knock. No one ever knocked on his door like that. Well, no one ever knocked on his door, at least not at half-seven in the morning.

At least this time it isn't three in the morning, and my nearest neighbors won't necessarily hear me cursing his arse off my doorstep. He swung open the heavy blue door and blinked into the watery morning light.

He beheld a disheveled man clutching an infant, accompanied by a boy with blue hair who towed a sniffling redheaded toddler.

"Harry?"

Potter didn't look up. "Ginny's dead."

 

***

 

Later, with the boys all settled and sleeping, they sat by the fire. Severus poured a brandy and handed it to his guest. "I'm so sorry, Harry. But why come here?"

Harry accepted the snifter without looking up, and was silent for a long time. In time, he trembled, then made a small bereft sound. Severus felt his heart lurch. Potter was weeping, for Merlin's sake. Snape rose from his chair and sat next to him, taking his hand.

"It's alright, Potter. You and your brood are welcome for as long as you like. I have plenty of room."

 

***

In the middle of the night, Severus woke with a start as a creak of the floorboard signaled an intruder. He leapt to his feet, wand at the ready, to confront a half-naked Harry, tears staining his face. In one movement he had his arms around thin shoulders and pulled him down into the warm bed. Not a word was spoken. Severus touched his lips to Harry's forehead, and Harry burrowed into the embrace like a child and slept.

In the hour before dawn he woke as a tentative hand stroked his hair and traced his arm under the bedclothes. Severus mumbled something and rolled over, and Harry spooned against the knobby spine, hand trailing along the ridge of ribs, waist, hip, while he planted soft kisses between Severus' shoulder blades.

"Potter..." Snape grumbled half-heartedly.

"Severussss..." Lips brushed his ear, and his body took notice, further south.

 

 

********  
YULE 2008  
LACOSTE, FRANCE

 

"Teddy! Get your brothers and come to table! Dinner is on!" Harry shouted from the archway, carrying a steaming platter of stuffed pumpkins. The table was piled high with an amazing feast of roast sanglier, golden chanterelles, haricot verts, poached pears and beautiful pies. Goblets of elf-made wine glowed in the blaze of floating candles. There were crackers at each place, wrapped in shiny paper. The kids laughed and tumbled into the dining room like a three-boy circus. Severus swooped in like a great bat and plucked three-year-old Albus off the floor, setting him atop a stack of heavy books on the chair next to him. He handed him a shiny cracker.

  
The youngest turned the gift in his pudgy hands. Across the table, Teddy gave a tug on his own cracker: "Like this, Al." It exploded with a pop and shot a stream of stars above the table, where they joined to become a leaping blue and green fish that splashed then disappeared in a shimmer of sparks. All the upturned faces were smiling.

  
Albus pulled his red cracker, and nothing happened. He tried again, and frowned. Jamie reached over and took one end, and together they pulled, and--Bang! Out of it leapt a tiny, snorting red mare, long mane and tail floating. She galloped around the table, tossing her beautiful head, then leapt over the roast boar, and dove back into the tube of red foil in Albus' hand. His eyes were like saucers. James clapped with glee. Harry gave Severus a look of gratitude.

They feasted until they could eat no more, and Harry sent the platters and plates floating to the kitchen and poured cups of tea. Severus cleared his throat. "Now, before we eat that pie, I have some things I would like to give each of you. If I may." He sat in the candle light of a suddenly very quiet room.

"For you, young Albus, a companion your namesake held dear." He presented the small boy with a plush phoenix. Albus beamed and clutched the toy to his heart.

"And for you, young James, something I think you will make very good use of as time goes on." Severus waved his wand and a long parcel flew into his hand. Jamie tore open the paper to find a toy broom, and Harry's eyebrows shot up, his face a peculiar mix of concern and delight. "Yes, I will certainly take you flying, but not until after breakfast." He ruffled his son's auburn hair.

Severus turned to the eldest boy. "Mr. Lupin, come this September, you will go to Hogwarts, if you so choose. When you do, I want you to have this." He slid a wooden box across the table to the blue-haired boy. Teddy opened the lid carefully and pulled out a polished spyglass and turned it in his hands. "It belonged to Remus, er, your father." Severus nearly croaked out the name of his lost friend. He looked into Teddy's astonished face and felt something give way inside.

Teddy's eyes were shining. "Thank you, sir."

Snape cleared his throat. "Harry...."

"Wait, Severus. I have something for you, as well."

"Keep your shirt on, Potter, I am not finished." Snape snapped, raising his formidable nose in an attempt to intimidate his lover. Harry did not look the least bit cowed, but he did close his mouth and sit.

"Harry," Severus' voice was warm. "Having you and your boys living here these past two years has given me more than I could have imagined." Severus looked into the eyes of each boy and came to rest on Harry, his expression unreadable. It was not a smile, but something deep and true, and more than a bit sad. "However, with young Lupin heading off to school, it occurred to me you will want to be closer to home." He passed an envelope to Harry. "This is my gift to you."

Harry looked questioningly at his lover. "Open it, Potter." Harry blushed and slipped a knife into the end of the envelope. A small photograph fell onto the table as he unfolded a sheaf of documents and studied them. "I... I don't understand. This looks like a deed, to a house in -- Melvaig? Where in Merlin's name is Melvaig?" Harry studied the picture, a muggle photo of a stone cottage overlooking the sea.

"Potter, I knew you couldn't stay here forever. The deed is to the last of my holdings from the Prince estate. My solicitor has been able to cleverly arrange a few things since my 'death' and I have put this into young Lupin's name. As I can never return to wizarding Britain, I have no use for a Scottish property."

Snape waited for Harry's reaction. Harry looked thoughtful, then amused. "Well, Severus, I have something for you, now." He handed the small leather box to Severus. When Snape opened the box, his eyebrows shot upward, he snapped the box closed and scowled. "Not very funny, Potter." Harry looked shocked. Then comprehending, he Accio'd a folded parchment from the bottom of the leather box, unfurled it, and began to read:

"On this fourteenth of November, 2008, the Wizengamot hereby grants full pardon to one Severus Snape, former Headmaster and Potions Master at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and spy for the Order of the Phoenix. We hereby award him an Order of Merlin, First Class, for his loyalty and service to the wizarding world above and beyond the call of duty."

 

Only once before in his life had Severus been so astonished as to find his jaw hanging open. Harry beamed.

"So you see, Severus, you might have reason for a cottage in Scotland after all."

 

 

********  
SEPTEMBER 13, 2009  
KING'S CROSS, PLATFORM 9 ¾

 

The gleaming red locomotive snorted steam like an earth-bound dragon as students with their trunks, pets, and families, all streamed down the platform. Teddy held Jamie by the hand or he would surely have climbed the thing. Harry floated the owl cage and trunk along while Severus carried Albus on his shoulders so he could see everything. Andromeda Tonks waved and joined them in the happy crowd, hugging Teddy until he squirmed with embarrassment. "Gran! I'm just going to Hogwarts, not to prison!" he grinned. She made an insincere scowl. "Merlin forbid, laddie! Now, you get yourself well sorted, you hear me? She winked. "And owl me. I will see you for hols, yes?" Teddy looked at Harry who smiled. "Yes Gran."

  
Harry offered his arm as she straightened up. "It will be so much easier to get together now that we're in Melvaig." Andromeda patted his hand, and smiled up at Severus and Albus, who together were quite tall. Severus watched Harry lean down to give Teddy a kiss, but the boy quickly stood tall and formally offered his hand. Harry restrained his grin and shook Teddy's hand, then clasped it in both of his hands. "All right, young Master Lupin. Go forth and find your right House. I know you will make me, Gran and your parents, proud no matter where you wind up." There was a glint of tear in his eye. Severus cleared his throat.

"Potter. Your son." Severus inclined his head toward the locomotive, where a small boy was climbing up onto the running boards.

 

 

********  
JANUARY 9, 2010  
MELVAIG, THE HIGHLANDS

 

Severus watched Teddy help Harry clear the dinner things off of the table.

_Smart-alec Ravenclaw who shows promise in potions. Aren't you even a bit surprised, Remus?_

James ran after a giggling Albus. "Give me that, Al! It's mine!" They careened around the kitchen table and skidded into Severus, who scooped up the four-year-old and held him aloft. "Albus Severus, give your brother the dragon", he intoned severely. The child blinked at him, and considered being intimidated. Then he let out a squeal as Severus tossed him in the air and caught him.

"Out! Out of my kitchen!" Harry shouted with mock rage, brandishing a wooden spoon and grinning ear-to-ear. Severus shooed the two boys into the front room and sat on the settee and had them climbing on his lap and demanding a story. "Accio, Wild Things!" he summoned, and the book flew across the room. He knew that Harry and Ted were preparing the cake that the boys had decorated earlier that day. He would pretend to be surprised, but he sincerely hoped they would skip the muggle tradition and not put 50 sodding candles on the thing.

I _t will be hideous enough without having to humiliate myself by coughing all over it._

He heard them whispering and lighting candles.

_I never expected to see this day._

They dimmed the lights, and he put down the storybook, and the three of them turned toward the kitchen and the approach of a blazing cake.

Although he rolled his eyes, he thought: _I think I want more of them._

 

***FIN***

 

 

 

Place Notes:  
Melvaig, The Highlands (Melvaig:Scottish Gaelic: in praise of wandering.) A town on the west coast of Scotland on Minch, the sea between the Hebrides and Scotland  
Faulensee, Switzerland A lake high in the Alps  
Koln, Germany Home to one of Europe's earliest universities with medical school, also notable in the perfume industry.  
Lacoste, Provence A perched village in lavender-growing region of France and home of the Marquis deSade's castle

 

 

 


End file.
